I have an excel table which is pretty simple, but putting together code is
not one of my specialties. Each "record" is listed across a row, and each
column of that row is a characteristic. I need a function which lays out
like this: (things in quotes will be examples)

IF "D1=chicken" then "F1=cluck" or something to that extent. I tried using
Find and Replace, but it just gets too complicated the way i was trying it
before. Any help would be AWESOME.