I don't think you can control it.
But Debra Dalgleish has some code to resize and reposition comments at:
http://contextures.com/xlcomments03.html
bluebadger wrote:
How do you keep the comment boxes the same size and shape when you are
editing columns and rows.
I often add/remove rows from the spreadsheet and whenever I do the
comment boxes either scrunch up so you can't see them or become really
really long?
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bluebadger
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Dave Peterson